learning, living, loving

This week’s topic was super interesting to me. I always wonder how difficult it would be for us to help the people who are poorer than us. I thought it was cool to hear both the No and the yes side of the argument, but I liked what Lucas said in class about the two being almost the same. The answer is yes, but there is a way to fix it. I agreed with that, thinking to myself how there may have been a cause, but there were also many solutions. There were a few solutions that stood out to me more than others and that seemed to make more sense to me, but I thought that all of the solutions were possible. If there is a solution that could benefit everyone, why wouldn’t we want that? Why wouldn’t we want to help the poor? 

My thinking has completely been reshaped by my learning community because of how we interact in class and how we ask questions. I do not usually enjoy working with groups because I have a need for control and like to know what is happening in every situation. However, in this class working with a group is extremely helpful and fulfilling. Every group I have been a part of has asked the hard questions, has been open and excited to share their learning with the group, and has been open to chatting casually and listening to each other’s thoughts. I think that (while breakout rooms stress me out) the breakout rooms have been great because it gives us an opportunity to get to know our peers that thanks to covid we haven’t been able to really meet or interact with like we would have normally.

This week I have practiced mindfulness a lot. Because of how chaotic life is and how busy school has gotten, as finals are coming around, quiet alone time has been very necessary for myself. While I have practiced mindfulness many different times this week, there was one time in particular that I feel like was the best. I was feeling stressed and a little sad for personal reasons. I live in a house with tons of girls and share a room with 3, so alone time is few and far between. As my feelings started to take over and my anxiety went rampant, I decided that a little drive would be a good idea for me. I got in my car and drove to a place in stillwater that held a lot of memories for me. I parked my car, turned to music down to a soft whisper, and closed my eyes. I started to breathe, focusing on my inhale and exhale. I listened closely to the music, the words, the melody, the memories that went along with that particular song. I inhaled deeply, taking note of the smell around me, and how the warm air coming out of my heater was filling my body with warmth with each breath. After about five minutes of breathing I opened my eyes and,,, you guessed it, grabbed my journal. I turned on my car light, opened up the book, and began to write. I carefully took note of all the feelings I was feeling, both good and bad. I looked around and remembered what the spot I was parked at meant to me. I envisioned myself outside of the car. I thought about the future and what that spot would mean to me one year from now, or even five years from now. After carefully thinking through my feelings and thoughts and writing them down I closed my journal and closed my eyes once again. As the soft whisper of the music played I smiled, remembering all the things that I did have, and forgetting the things I was struggling with.

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