A Me I Never Knew

This past week I did not feel I contributed as much to the room. Our discussions on the readings are much easier when I am able to get a sense of what everyone else got out of them first, but I decided to share some of my thoughts first to get my classmates thinking, but also assist in making things more comfortable. No one likes to speak first. I was able to listen and learn about the things that I did not catch while reading. Being able to discuss with our shoulder partners is something that I have actually come to enjoy. I was able to speak with others that I had not really talked to before and I found a friend. Though the task was to come up with a consensus of a particular question, we had fun with it and laughed along the way. I think the first thing each of us says every time we turn to converse is, “I have no idea what I even read” or “what are we supposed to figure out?”. It feels good to know that I am not the only one that does not always understand what we read before walking through the classroom door, but the best feeling is walking out of those doors and knowing more than before.

Getting in our teams for the infographic project was also a big highlight of my week. Each person in my group contributes something valuable and I love getting to know a new part of them every time we come together. Our wicked problem we chose to focus on seems unique, so putting all of our heads together and finding a way to express the issue to others will be gratifying. Though it takes more than four people to find an effective solution, we are still making a difference by being aware of the problem and trying to do what we can in order to reverse the effects. Knowledge is key.

Continuing to practice mindfulness in class has given me a peace that I have never felt before. For blog two I never discussed my experience outside of the class, because I had not practiced doing so yet. I chose not to make up a phony impression because I wanted to be truthful and share a real encounter with it. I decided to start utilizing the tool of mindfulness and I have loved every minute of it. I get nervous, anxious, and stressed over just about anything imaginable. Usually in order to get over those obstacles I call my dad or cry it out if needed. I decided to stop ignoring the outlet placed in front me and use it to my advantage. Because I am not quite used to doing it on my own, I just sit on my brown carpeted floor with the lights off and closed eyes. My thoughts wander often, so I have to force myself to reach back for the present moment. Sometimes I cannot quite find the present, but when I am in a different place, I just hold onto whatever I cannot let go of and let it somehow resolve itself. I am able to find tranquility in things that I used to let hurt and bring me down. I find a calmness within myself that keeps me sane. I am forever grateful to know a way to fight through the struggles I have ignored for so long.

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